I figure a fresh start is in order. Plus half of my posts on this blog are political-ish rants and I want to be all creative instead.
New blog: JordanWarrior.blogspot.co.uk
It's also easier to spell. You have no idea how hard it is trying to type "heathenutterances" when you're half asleep. It's terrible. Anyway, I've posted over my latest post, which now that I think about it is called "it's been a while...". You can't start a blog with a title like that- ah fuck it. So, yes! New blog.
I don't know how long it will last, and it's not like I have a following anyway, but I really like the idea of starting again. Maybe in a year I'll look back and smile, because I've come so far. Or maybe I'll shake my head and start another blog because I did three posts and gave up. I'm betting on the latter.
At the moment I'm about to eat Bran Flakes with banana. I am living the dream.
Jordan
Current Song:
Saturday, 22 February 2014
Friday, 21 February 2014
So it's been a while...
Things are a bit strange at the moment. I think a year back I was much happier, but there's no point dwelling on the past.
I still have my aspirations, if anything they've grown into an octopus of "I will do [X]" but it's an octopus I plan to get into. Phrasing.
At some point I want to get really proactive, and by using the term "at some point" I think it's quite clear that day isn't today, or even this month. For now I'm just working through some things, trying to get back on my feet. I don't think I'll ever do half as much as I plan to, but when you make so many plans, you still get a lot done.
It's really hard to find the motivation to do anything, but then I look at myself and think you're nearly 24 and you haven't done anything since you hit 23. I think Nathan has a t-shirt that says "Fuck time before time fucks you". Pretty much sums it up.
So... plans. I want to make a gauntlet (don't ask) just to see if I can, and if I've learned anything since I got a job, it's that frivolous spending fits me like a glove... an armoured glove. Next month I'm moving in with a couple of friends. I'd always planned to move around this time, just in a slightly different way, and there's just something completely soul sucking about moving back into the room you grew up in. It's sort of like you never left. Home's great but I need my independence.
At some point - here come the big plans - I want to make a huge push into creative endeavors (try and find a more pompous term... you just can't do it) as at the moment I'm doing a part time job which pays relatively well (though not well enough to live on comfortably) and I get a lot of free time. Free time in which I don't do a whole lot.
Anyway, those "Creative... Endeavors". Might as well pull out the bullet points.
My plan for this week is to download Sony Vegas and Photoshop and start fiddling with them. Phrasing. That and clear my floordrobe. I'm worried it's becoming sentient.
Jordan
P.S. I love this song, it's beautiful.
I still have my aspirations, if anything they've grown into an octopus of "I will do [X]" but it's an octopus I plan to get into. Phrasing.
At some point I want to get really proactive, and by using the term "at some point" I think it's quite clear that day isn't today, or even this month. For now I'm just working through some things, trying to get back on my feet. I don't think I'll ever do half as much as I plan to, but when you make so many plans, you still get a lot done.
It's really hard to find the motivation to do anything, but then I look at myself and think you're nearly 24 and you haven't done anything since you hit 23. I think Nathan has a t-shirt that says "Fuck time before time fucks you". Pretty much sums it up.
So... plans. I want to make a gauntlet (don't ask) just to see if I can, and if I've learned anything since I got a job, it's that frivolous spending fits me like a glove... an armoured glove. Next month I'm moving in with a couple of friends. I'd always planned to move around this time, just in a slightly different way, and there's just something completely soul sucking about moving back into the room you grew up in. It's sort of like you never left. Home's great but I need my independence.
At some point - here come the big plans - I want to make a huge push into creative endeavors (try and find a more pompous term... you just can't do it) as at the moment I'm doing a part time job which pays relatively well (though not well enough to live on comfortably) and I get a lot of free time. Free time in which I don't do a whole lot.
Anyway, those "Creative... Endeavors". Might as well pull out the bullet points.
- Webcomic: one per week
- Youtube gaming vid: one per week
- Music cover: one, just fucking one
- WRITE A NOVEL... OR TWO... THIS YEAR.
My plan for this week is to download Sony Vegas and Photoshop and start fiddling with them. Phrasing. That and clear my floordrobe. I'm worried it's becoming sentient.
Jordan
P.S. I love this song, it's beautiful.
Wednesday, 31 July 2013
Let's let the patriarchal overlords dictate our meals from now on. They surely know best.
[Alternate post title was "That horrifying moment when China supports your actions"]
Here's a fun game.
Imagine that the government was worried about childhood obesity. I mean, I'm sure they are. There are little balls of heart disease roaming the streets and you can't pay taxes if you're dead. Anyway, the government decides that something must be done. They set down a law which means nobody, and I mean fucking nobody, can buy junk food (pizzas, doughnuts etc) without getting a card which states you opt-out of the ban on fatty food. It's for the children, yeah?
Anyway, if you want a pizza you have to go to the counter and explain that you want to eat fatty foods. The clerk kinda squints at you and calls you "fat fuck" in her head and hands you the forms which take a few minutes to fill in. Boom, you have your card.
But what if you don't have your card? What if you go to a different supermarket? Well, you can't have a pizza. And it's not just pizza. The government said it would be purely fatty foods, but it's cheese too, it's creme freche and semi-skinned milk and pretty much everything but pasta, beans and vegetables. Wait a minute, we didn't agree to that? We wanted to protect the children. The parents clearly couldn't moderate what they were buying and do their jobs, and now everyone must bear the weight of ensuring parents don't have to do a fucking thing to make sure their kids eat right.
Heaven forbid they might try and talk to their child about choosing the right things to eat*. Nope, let's just slap a ban on it and the freaks who want to be able to choose what they eat can jump through the hoops. What if you thought your favorite food wasn't too fatty? What if you moderated yourself anyway? What if eventually there isn't an "opt-out" because it's not in the best interests of the children? Hope you don't like chocolate.
I pray to fucking God I haven't just predicted "Phase 2".
*I'm sorry if you walked in on your son unwrapping a turkey twizzler. I get that it's tough with all the exposure and you can't watch your kids all the time, but it's not justification for intrusive and oppressive laws. I totally support an easy to use "opt-in" policy, where concerned parents can prevent access to delicious cake, but that's not what we're dealing with here.
Here's a fun game.
Imagine that the government was worried about childhood obesity. I mean, I'm sure they are. There are little balls of heart disease roaming the streets and you can't pay taxes if you're dead. Anyway, the government decides that something must be done. They set down a law which means nobody, and I mean fucking nobody, can buy junk food (pizzas, doughnuts etc) without getting a card which states you opt-out of the ban on fatty food. It's for the children, yeah?
Anyway, if you want a pizza you have to go to the counter and explain that you want to eat fatty foods. The clerk kinda squints at you and calls you "fat fuck" in her head and hands you the forms which take a few minutes to fill in. Boom, you have your card.
But what if you don't have your card? What if you go to a different supermarket? Well, you can't have a pizza. And it's not just pizza. The government said it would be purely fatty foods, but it's cheese too, it's creme freche and semi-skinned milk and pretty much everything but pasta, beans and vegetables. Wait a minute, we didn't agree to that? We wanted to protect the children. The parents clearly couldn't moderate what they were buying and do their jobs, and now everyone must bear the weight of ensuring parents don't have to do a fucking thing to make sure their kids eat right.
Heaven forbid they might try and talk to their child about choosing the right things to eat*. Nope, let's just slap a ban on it and the freaks who want to be able to choose what they eat can jump through the hoops. What if you thought your favorite food wasn't too fatty? What if you moderated yourself anyway? What if eventually there isn't an "opt-out" because it's not in the best interests of the children? Hope you don't like chocolate.
I pray to fucking God I haven't just predicted "Phase 2".
*I'm sorry if you walked in on your son unwrapping a turkey twizzler. I get that it's tough with all the exposure and you can't watch your kids all the time, but it's not justification for intrusive and oppressive laws. I totally support an easy to use "opt-in" policy, where concerned parents can prevent access to delicious cake, but that's not what we're dealing with here.
Friday, 4 January 2013
Masters at Edge Hill
At the end of my undergrad I had seriously started writing and taking part in good writing practice. I was attending every seminar (mostly) and every reading and actually enjoying all the set texts. It's been much of the same really. Sometimes I worry my gaming centred lifestyle will leave me with regrets, and I know that one day I'll have to completely leave behind gaming, at least as a lifestyle if I want to be part of the literary world.
On the Masters I'm loving it. There isn't a class that I don't enjoy, a visiting reader I don't benefit from. When I'm around that environment it makes me want to write, to start my life again as a writer. Even if it's an abstract poetry reading I find the sound of it soothing and usually get my notebook out and start writing work of my own. It's not that I'm bored, I just work best doing my own thing: I still listen to the poetry but I end up with two pages of my novel.
I love the workshops too. A lot of my issues come from wanting to be at a professional standard and seeing some of my classmates already at that level it produces equal levels of both envy and happiness that people so down to earth can be that good without spending their lives in pursuit of becoming a novelist.
It's sort of like being in front of a pool of ice-cold water, you stand on the edge and only when you thrust yourself in do you realise how refreshing it can be. There's hope yet
On the Masters I'm loving it. There isn't a class that I don't enjoy, a visiting reader I don't benefit from. When I'm around that environment it makes me want to write, to start my life again as a writer. Even if it's an abstract poetry reading I find the sound of it soothing and usually get my notebook out and start writing work of my own. It's not that I'm bored, I just work best doing my own thing: I still listen to the poetry but I end up with two pages of my novel.
I love the workshops too. A lot of my issues come from wanting to be at a professional standard and seeing some of my classmates already at that level it produces equal levels of both envy and happiness that people so down to earth can be that good without spending their lives in pursuit of becoming a novelist.
It's sort of like being in front of a pool of ice-cold water, you stand on the edge and only when you thrust yourself in do you realise how refreshing it can be. There's hope yet
Discipline and Whips
I may have just roped you in with such a title or maybe you’re
just that bored. Recently, I have been thinking about why I never get things
done, why I have such little motivation to act but such huge aspirations and
goals. I don’t use my time well. An average day is spent flicking from social
network, to one-a-day t-shirt website, to fantasy football site and repeated. I
don’t actually do anything most days, I while the time away on avoiding action.
After reading Murakami I have realised that it is Discipline
that I lack. Maybe I’m underconfident too but that’s an issue that stems from a
fear of trying so hard and failing anyway – if I don’t try how can I fail? – or
perhaps a better word is cowardice. Murakami is a writer who has ran pretty
consistently for most of his life, on average six miles a day. He’s also a
famous novelist.
What he argues is that you need to strengthen the body and
mind to write and as I want to run and write then that’s what I’m going to need
to do. It won’t be easy whipping myself into shape, I’m 17 stone at the moment
and so running whilst carrying an extra four stones than I should be makes it
quite exhausting. I cycle a lot but cycling isn’t great for weight loss, at
least I don’t do it enough or eat healthily enough to make it so. I want to
start (from tomorrow of course, everything is always tomorrow) running 4 days a
week and writing for an hour a day. Murakami wrote something that really
bothered me.
I’ve put off writing because I have a perfect idea of what
my novel should be. What he states is that running is not about perfection, it’s
about doing it in the same way you don’t need to write about something, you can
write about nothing. I can’t go on just putting things off and saying tomorrow
and doing nothing the next day. I hate that I have such poor discipline and
wonder if I can fix it.
Whilst doing a research essay I came across an article that
states that writers need to be a little arrogant, in that you assume that your
writing is worth reading and good enough to be above every other unpublished
writer that has a manuscript on a pendrive. I have always been overcritical of
my writing and perhaps that needs to stop. If can stop being so self-loathing
about my mistakes then maybe I can write past them and start to relish the idea
of writing. Murakami says that you should stop writing right at the point you
feel you can write more, that way it will be easier to start the next day. I’m
going to try this.
Oh, and I suppose I’ll try and stop flicking over Facebook
and the rest, once a day will suffice. Of course I will break this rule. I
think the running will help my need for human contact, self-improvement usually
fills that void in my chest that’s constantly trying to expand. Always end on a
high.
Saturday, 29 December 2012
Why saying "men are bastards" is akin to racism
It’s a huge irk of mine that whenever a person screws over another person, it’s not because that person is just a twat; it’s because of their gender. If you’re finding a large number of one gender are arseholes, then it’s more likely that you’re picking the wrong people to be around than the whole gender comprises of such flawed characteristics. You wouldn’t do it with race, you wouldn’t say “all black people are dickheads” because one person shouldered you in the street. What makes it acceptable (other than ignorance and double standards)?
Maybe it’s something to draw comfort from, that you don’t make bad choices, just that you have been victim to the nature of the world. But it’s not, let’s face it. We’re at a time when true equality should be starting to shine through, and my idea of true equality is not defining race, gender or sexuality, because that way everything can be viewed from a purely individual standpoint.
My favourite part of the whole "Men are pigs" generalisation is that I am basically being called a pig, my friends who are nice guys and generally caring are being called pigs (despite the person never having met them) and my brothers are too. It's so ignorant when you think about it, it's sexism that completely mirrors racism. Is it a statement that men are so incapable of individuality that they should be bracketed together? Are men all alike? Do we eat the same food, have the same hobbies, show the same (lack of) compassion? Think it through.
And I’m not “one of the good ones” in regards to men. I wouldn’t mind being called a good person, because being a good person is completely different from being “the less murderous member of the Manson family”, which is what “one of the good ones” is pretty much implying.
Maybe it’s something to draw comfort from, that you don’t make bad choices, just that you have been victim to the nature of the world. But it’s not, let’s face it. We’re at a time when true equality should be starting to shine through, and my idea of true equality is not defining race, gender or sexuality, because that way everything can be viewed from a purely individual standpoint.
My favourite part of the whole "Men are pigs" generalisation is that I am basically being called a pig, my friends who are nice guys and generally caring are being called pigs (despite the person never having met them) and my brothers are too. It's so ignorant when you think about it, it's sexism that completely mirrors racism. Is it a statement that men are so incapable of individuality that they should be bracketed together? Are men all alike? Do we eat the same food, have the same hobbies, show the same (lack of) compassion? Think it through.
And I’m not “one of the good ones” in regards to men. I wouldn’t mind being called a good person, because being a good person is completely different from being “the less murderous member of the Manson family”, which is what “one of the good ones” is pretty much implying.
Wednesday, 2 May 2012
I am a torrenter and you should be too.
This is a huge topic and I'm really angry right now. And with what right? I'm angry that I can't receive television shows for free. But here is my logic.
I will buy the series I have downloaded on DVD if they are good, I really will, I own Battlestar Galactica on DVD and I'm still going to torrent the series. Why? Because I prefer the file formats. I hate having to sift through and locate a DVD to watch one episode. Call it lazy, but it's not, it's irritation at an obsolete file format. The amount of times I've had a DVD fuck up on me (rented from Blockbuster) it's unreal (about 6 times actually, quite real). But the point is, provided I get the money, I will buy the boxsets of the series I have downloaded, thus the whole "stealing from artists" logic is defeated. Fuck you MPAA I really do hate your shortsighted moneygrabbing ways-
Next: so we're allowed to stream the shows online for free after they've aired (see: 4oD) but the anti-P2P groups problem is that we own them instead of just streaming it? I hate streaming, it's inconsistent and without the internet it's useless, whereas downloading means you can enjoy shows anywhere, anytime. There's a hypocrisy that you can stream any music, but downloading it is punishable by prison time (maximum sentence). If I'm on a laptop, what's the difference between clicking twice to play a song from my downloads and clicking twice to find a song in my favourites? 2 years of assrape. That's what.
Virgin Media recently (very damn recently) blocked Piratebay. While there were a hundred proxies to bypass this within five minutes, (thus making their action pointless) it was a symbolic victory for the People's Republic of MPAA. We've taken a huge leap towards internet censorship, it's e-1984 in the making. Or China. That's right, those evil communists whom were judged so harshly for blocking certain sites are laughing their genitals off at the hypocrisy. And we did it for money too. Well played. Great morals.
Even if Piratebay was stopped more would spring up to fill the P2P void. And seriously, Piratebay is a goddamn legend, they've been through more court battles (and MPAA funded assassination attempts [on the servers, not the staff. Shit, I think I just gave the MPAA an idea]) than your mother has been through penii. That's a word. Or it will be, I'll make it so. Removing one distribution hub does nothing, it's like shifting the crackheads from the den in the east side of the city to the west. They're still in the city, they're still on crack. Nothing changes.
To the MPAA: And what the fuck? How stupid can you be? Are you still grasping for the golden years where people paid £10 a film without a complaint? That time is over, but your ability to make money is not. Why not look at Steam, who sell cheap products because they're downloaded. It would be easy to sell Movies and Series for £1, and get 10x the people buying them, and promoting them (because you can't deny torrenting increases the popularity of a show, which by proxy increases the merchandise sales and advertising sales for the next seasons of shows etc) and actually evolving to the internet world we live in. Offer the films/series in a selectable format (AVI, MKV, MP4) and I'm yours. But nothing you've done makes me want to buy DVDs. In fact it makes me hate you, because you're resorting to heavy-handed tactics. We're 5 years from Anti-P2P deathsquads roving around tracking packets, and 5 years away from V for Vendetta (which inconsequentially I legally own).
I will buy the series I have downloaded on DVD if they are good, I really will, I own Battlestar Galactica on DVD and I'm still going to torrent the series. Why? Because I prefer the file formats. I hate having to sift through and locate a DVD to watch one episode. Call it lazy, but it's not, it's irritation at an obsolete file format. The amount of times I've had a DVD fuck up on me (rented from Blockbuster) it's unreal (about 6 times actually, quite real). But the point is, provided I get the money, I will buy the boxsets of the series I have downloaded, thus the whole "stealing from artists" logic is defeated. Fuck you MPAA I really do hate your shortsighted moneygrabbing ways-
Next: so we're allowed to stream the shows online for free after they've aired (see: 4oD) but the anti-P2P groups problem is that we own them instead of just streaming it? I hate streaming, it's inconsistent and without the internet it's useless, whereas downloading means you can enjoy shows anywhere, anytime. There's a hypocrisy that you can stream any music, but downloading it is punishable by prison time (maximum sentence). If I'm on a laptop, what's the difference between clicking twice to play a song from my downloads and clicking twice to find a song in my favourites? 2 years of assrape. That's what.
Virgin Media recently (very damn recently) blocked Piratebay. While there were a hundred proxies to bypass this within five minutes, (thus making their action pointless) it was a symbolic victory for the People's Republic of MPAA. We've taken a huge leap towards internet censorship, it's e-1984 in the making. Or China. That's right, those evil communists whom were judged so harshly for blocking certain sites are laughing their genitals off at the hypocrisy. And we did it for money too. Well played. Great morals.
Even if Piratebay was stopped more would spring up to fill the P2P void. And seriously, Piratebay is a goddamn legend, they've been through more court battles (and MPAA funded assassination attempts [on the servers, not the staff. Shit, I think I just gave the MPAA an idea]) than your mother has been through penii. That's a word. Or it will be, I'll make it so. Removing one distribution hub does nothing, it's like shifting the crackheads from the den in the east side of the city to the west. They're still in the city, they're still on crack. Nothing changes.
To the MPAA: And what the fuck? How stupid can you be? Are you still grasping for the golden years where people paid £10 a film without a complaint? That time is over, but your ability to make money is not. Why not look at Steam, who sell cheap products because they're downloaded. It would be easy to sell Movies and Series for £1, and get 10x the people buying them, and promoting them (because you can't deny torrenting increases the popularity of a show, which by proxy increases the merchandise sales and advertising sales for the next seasons of shows etc) and actually evolving to the internet world we live in. Offer the films/series in a selectable format (AVI, MKV, MP4) and I'm yours. But nothing you've done makes me want to buy DVDs. In fact it makes me hate you, because you're resorting to heavy-handed tactics. We're 5 years from Anti-P2P deathsquads roving around tracking packets, and 5 years away from V for Vendetta (which inconsequentially I legally own).
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